After the important game was over a second game started. People began to move around but several people stayed in the living room watching the TV. I had a few more snacks and I began conversations with the two women seated next to me. About 20 or 30 minutes later I noticed something interesting. All the other women were gathering in the kitchen.
My two female friends and I quickly got up and joined the other ladies in the kitchen. As soon as we left the living room the other men who had less than desirable seating in the living room moved and took over our spots and then we were segregated. The men were lounging on the couches and the women were standing in the kitchen. I did not expect that to happen.
The unspoken social convention of keeping the women in the kitchen was alive at this party. It wasn't on purpose but it was natural for the women to not be very interested in the sports on the TV. It wasn't as if the men were preventing us from hanging out with them but it just happened.
It was fascinating to me. I wouldn't consider the couple who hosted the party to have strict traditional gender roles. I don't think this women makes dinner for the man every night. They share in the tasks. However, I can't speculate on what happens when no one is watching;)
I don't consider myself a feminist. I don't really want to mow the lawn, take care of the car or pick up dead things. I don't mind cooking meals or laundry but I would never consider myself to be a caretaker to anyone. I like things to be (sort of) equal.
However, this phenomenon at parties fascinates me. Why is it so natural for people to segregate themselves at parties. I understand that part of the separation stems from the fact that many women have similar interests and things in common. But when we are segregated why do we (women) always end up in the kitchen. Why don't the men end up there? I think it is because as much as we deny it we still self sort ourselves into gender roles. It is just the way it is.
I try to buck the system. I know I stayed in the living room much longer than the other women but it didn't work. The separation still happened. Next time I am going to try and stay in the living room and see what happens.
My two female friends and I quickly got up and joined the other ladies in the kitchen. As soon as we left the living room the other men who had less than desirable seating in the living room moved and took over our spots and then we were segregated. The men were lounging on the couches and the women were standing in the kitchen. I did not expect that to happen.
The unspoken social convention of keeping the women in the kitchen was alive at this party. It wasn't on purpose but it was natural for the women to not be very interested in the sports on the TV. It wasn't as if the men were preventing us from hanging out with them but it just happened.
It was fascinating to me. I wouldn't consider the couple who hosted the party to have strict traditional gender roles. I don't think this women makes dinner for the man every night. They share in the tasks. However, I can't speculate on what happens when no one is watching;)
I don't consider myself a feminist. I don't really want to mow the lawn, take care of the car or pick up dead things. I don't mind cooking meals or laundry but I would never consider myself to be a caretaker to anyone. I like things to be (sort of) equal.
However, this phenomenon at parties fascinates me. Why is it so natural for people to segregate themselves at parties. I understand that part of the separation stems from the fact that many women have similar interests and things in common. But when we are segregated why do we (women) always end up in the kitchen. Why don't the men end up there? I think it is because as much as we deny it we still self sort ourselves into gender roles. It is just the way it is.
I try to buck the system. I know I stayed in the living room much longer than the other women but it didn't work. The separation still happened. Next time I am going to try and stay in the living room and see what happens.
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