December 8, 2012

"A little gossip, A little chat, A little idol talk of this, And that"

Something happened this week that I just cannot shake.  I was out to drinks after work with some people and the group began to talk about a person we all knew (N).  All of a sudden a "friend" stated with a booming voice and force that N was ugly.  She went on to say that N's face was ugly and and she was very unattractive.  I was extremely bothered by the tone of this conversation.  I spoke up and said that was a horrible thing to say about N.  The group knocked me down a bit for being so outspoken and there was a few awkward moments. The conversation moved on my brain kept mulling over this conversation.

The next day I saw the person who said the rude comments and brought it up again.  I told her how bothered I was by her statements.  She defended herself and she didn't see anything wrong with what she said and she stood by her words.

That was the problem.  I don't want to be around people who think that way.  I think it just brings you down.  It is so hard to be a good person and to be kind to others.  Much harder than being shitty and pointing out the flaws.

I don't want to be that kind of person.  I don't want to be sucked into mean spirited gossip and conversations.  I don't want to laugh at the expense of others.  I want to treat others as I want to be treated.  Saying this is easy but putting it into practice is super hard.

I think it is a natural thing for people to gossip about others.  I don't think you can ever really be free from it. However, there is gossip that is factual, neutral and mean spirited.  I don't want to participate in determining who has fake boobs and judge them for it.  I like to know things and I like to know about other people but I hope there is a right way to do it.

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