I have been at my new job for two and a half weeks and it is going great. I like the company and the way they run their operations. I like my job, specifically, that it is so engaging and utilizes my brain a good part of the day. As a matter of fact I was working so diligently today I was very happy to switch to a more repetitive task to have a break this afternoon.
However, even when things are going good there is bound to be something bad. The commute. It is K-I-L-L-I-N-G me! It takes me in excess of an hour and a half to get to work each day. I leave my house at 7:15 and I often arrive about 8:45. Seriously, that is obnoxious. I kept brushing it off as slow due to the snow but I am beginning to realize that this is normal and how it is always going to be. Sigh!
A couple good (evil) friends gave me a suggestion today. It was simple...leave for work earlier. Specifically at 6:30. They tried to be helpful and explained that it is no big deal to leave so early and I would get used to it after a short time. AHHHHHH...it is a BFD. Um..do you know me. If you do, you know how much I detest getting up early in the morning. Ug...except that they have a point. I want to whine and they have a point. If I get to work earlier I could leave earlier. That sounds attractive. Sort of?
The ironic part of this story is that I have been having some hard core daydreams about riding my bike to work in the spring. I have already devised a way to make it work. I know what time I need to leave my house, um...5:30am and where to shower before work and where I can leave my bike during the day. It sounds good on paper. But...seriously...5:30am. Crazy talk. Except that it is attractive crazy talk when it is about biking.
The other thing I don't really like about my new job is lunchtime. You are probably wondering what could be wrong with lunchtime and the answer is too many people. In an effort to save money and watch my daily calories I have been bringing my lunch to work every day. While I eat lunch I like to ready my book and look at my phone and catch up on the days correspondence. That just isn't possible in the lunch room. It is a small room with only two tables that seat about eight people. Each day there are at least four other people in the room and it isn't possible to ignore them. Today I was at a table by myself and a group of people came in and insisted that I join them. I did and I enjoyed their company but I just have no time to myself there. I find myself desiring more alone time when I am at work.
I know if I went out to eat each day I would be able to do as I please but I also know I would end up eating way too many calories or in an effort to be careful, I would leave the restaurant still hungry. Neither option is very desirable. I just do not know what to do. I know the right answer is to still bring my lunch and also to be friendly to my fellow co-workers but **whining to come** can't they just leave me alone for a while. I think I find it so stressful because everyone is so new to me. It takes so much more effort to socialize with new people that it does with friends.
On the upside there is a park across the street from my office so when it is warm out I could go outside and sit there but that is many months away. Plus, it may be a hangout for the homeless??? Other than being rude, and I really want to avoid that behavior, I don't know what else to do. Any suggestions?
16 comments:
well, i haven't posted in a while since my last post was so offensive so I will try to avoid that same behavior this time. :)
I think you need to get up early in the morning and leave your house by 630 and leave early. This would allow you plenty of time to ride your bike. If you wish to ride your bike after work you can bring it with you and ride for hours after you get off work at 3 or 4pm in the afternoon. Plus, I have been giving this advice to you for years. The mindset to get up early in the morning is the same as choosing to lose weight. If its important to you then make that decision.
Ditto Lou, actually. I, too, hate getting up early in the mornings, but that's why God made Sundays. To sleep in :-) And you really DO get used to it. Honestly. (And it makes sleeping in all that much better when you get a chance to do it :-)
I say eat at your desk. My situation is a bit different, but that's what I do. With my headphones on. Works like a charm. But only do this a couple of times per week. You do want to get to know your coworkers eventually...right?
PS. I'm so glad you like your new job so much. I'm really really really glad.
I say that you can lunch around people without talking to them (beyond Hi) and without being rude. Next time, I see you, I will show you the technique. As for the park, tell me which park it is, and I'll let you know if it is OK. As you know, I lived downtown for years and my good friend Cori still does. So we now which spots are not troublesome.
If the lunch room is set up in a way to suggest socializing (in other words, no 1- or 2-tops), then no, I don't think you can eat your lunch in there and not be social, or perhaps to put it another way, I wouldn't recommend doing it.
You are a new hire and people are curious about you. Some of them would probably like to be your friend; others simply want to learn more about you. If you deliberately close yourself off, you may be sending a signal you do not wish to send.
That doesn't mean you can't eat by yourself from time to time, just that it might not work well in your setup. Ems' suggestion is a decent one, although the problem is that you don't get a break when you do it that way. (No, a break at your desk isn't the same as a break away from your desk.)
It looks like you work a few blocks northwest of where I was contracting at one point. One good option, weather permitting, would be to walk to Subway or something like that. That might combine a short break away from the office (and outside!) with a reasonably healthy meal that's relatively inexpensive. The Marsh at Vermont and Alabama also has a nice deli with sandwiches and such, although you'd have to be more careful there because they have bad snacks.
Yes, it is difficult when you are new and everyone else is not, but it's a good opportunity to practice making friends. At the very least, a few well-placed friends can help to explain some of the other people in the office ...
Oh ... I almost forgot. It's only a BFD if you keep telling yourself it is. Do not be one of those people who complains and does nothing to change things. Be one of those people who changes things.
Change is gooooooood. :-) You can DO it!!!
I typed now instead of know in my last post. As for waking up, I don't believe you should wake up at 5:30 unless YOU want to. Of course, you can do it, but do you really want to do that? Only you can make that decision and put forth the required effort. I agree with you, it is a big deal.
@Lou...I agree with you that it is a mindset but I feel unwilling to change that at this time. Perhaps it is going to take some time for reality to sink in. I would hope the 1.5 hour commutes would have fixed that for me. Soon.
@Em...I have considered eating at my desk but it makes me feel selfconscious. Like I shouldn't be doing that but I see people doing it all the time. I will give it some thought.
@Z...I have found the Subway near my office and I have visited it a few times. It is a good option.
@Moore..I work in the same block as your friend. Ask her about the park. I would be interested.
At the risk of picking nits ... people typically describe commutes in terms of one-way travel. You have a 45-minute commute and spend about 90 minutes per day on the road. (If you want to complain, try a 60- or 75-minute trip in each direction; of course you know I've considered worse.)
Nope...it is taking me 90 minutes in the morning and 45 minutes in the evening. 2 hours and fifteen minutes. Sick!!!!
I know you have considered worse and in theory it sounded horrible. But the reality is soo much worse. Horrible. Terrible. Don't do it. Find something local. You will hate it.
At what time do you leave, and what roads do you take, when it takes you 90 minutes? You don't live that much farther north/east than I do, and it wasn't taking me that long to get to Lilly or Hirons.
I have been leaving at 7:15 and going down 69 S. to Fall Creek and then to Meridian. That appears to be the best way but there is always something delaying the traffic in the morning.
69 and Fall Creek are bottlenecks. The former doesn't have many alternatives (everything else is longer and slower unless 69 is stopped), but Fall Creek isn't that good, and Meridian is terrible.
I'd recommend 465 South to 70 East; you should be able to exit directly onto Michigan at the split. (65 also passes close to where you work, but I'm unsure of that exit as I never took the 65 part of the split.) Most traffic at rush hour goes toward 465 West.
On the way back, the 65/70 split can be difficult, but traffic generally goes pretty smoothly from 70 to 465 North. Getting on 69 is tough, though ...
Ok...Thanks for the advice. Usually 69S is my biggest problem but Binford can be terrible also. I will try the 465 route tomorrow and I will see if that helps. However, most of my problems are on the way to work as the route home is usually smooth.
If traffic isn't moving at all (you check a traffic site before you leave, right?), you can take Cumberland south. It's slow, so not recommended unless people aren't moving on 37 or 69. You can take it to 116th or 96th if there are localized issues, or to 96th to Hague to 82nd (or even to Shadeland and onto 465 South if there are real issues).
Two suggestions....first lunch is a very important networking time. Save that stuff for maybe one day a week and take a walk with your stuff. This will make your work environment so much better b/c you need these relationships to make work fun. You isolated yourself on your last job and look how much you hated it. Try to make an effort to be social. Also you can join me at nifs in the morning. AT first it stinks, but then it will be a habit and you will love it.
GH
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