I was on vacation in Florida on Sunday for my birthday. I generally don't like to make a big deal of this yearly event so I didn't advertise the day to my friends. However, I had a discussion the day prior to the big day with moorewrites about my birthday and my favorite cake. BTW...I love chocolate cake with chocolate icing. YUM!
My weirdness about my birthday caused some uncomfortableness with my companions. We had spent the day dining out, shopping and having fun. We headed back to the house at 4:30 to change so we could go to the beach to ogle the multimillion dollar homes adjacent to it and to watch the sunset. When we got in the house NM requested that everyone go and get ready for the beach while she made the Sangria.
I said OK and I headed upstairs. I promptly returned five minutes later ready for some beach walking when moorewrites stopped me in the hall to comment on the painting. I thought it was odd but I gave her my opinion and then we headed into the kitchen. There stood NM and J carrying a platter of cake and singing Happy Birthday.
I was stunned and shocked. I felt like a deer in headlights and I said, "Please don't sing". All of that attention was making me very uncomfortable and I didn't know why. They started on the second verse and again I said, "Please stop singing". I didn't yell, but said it quietly with much seriousness. They stopped singing and the room got a bit awkward.
We recovered quickly and I thanked them for the cake. But why couldn't I just let them sing? They were trying to be nice and make me feel good. Why is it so hard for me to let other people do nice things for me? I now feel bad for creating the awkward situation and for not being able to accept their generosity. I wish I was better at handling these types of situations.
This made me think of the Happiness book that we read a couple months ago. We took a strength and weakness test and my 4th highest weakness was "Capacity to loved and be loved". I find that to be very telling and obviously something I need to work on.
OK...the next time someone tries to give me cake and sing Happy Birthday to me I will try really hard to let them.
October 28, 2009
October 23, 2009
Ageing Gracefully
Last year I was pretty depressed about my birthday and I had a hard time for about three weeks accepting that I was getting older. I have never worried about those things in the past but it hit me bad last year. I am glad to report that I don’t feel like that this year. I am more accepting of ageing but it does make me sad that my face doesn’t look youthful anymore.
I was having dinner with a friend last Friday night and I was complaining about the tiny little lines around my eyes. She looked at me and rolled her eyes and said they were not noticeable but, I should probably get more sleep because of the large dark circles under my eyes. GASP! She told me I looked tired. She wasn’t being mean. I think she was trying to be helpful. She then asked me what time I go to bed at night. I sheepishly replied 1:00AM.
I would like to say that I am going to go to bed earlier but I really don’t believe that I am willing to change that habit yet. I don’t like being tired in the morning but I cannot go to sleep at night until I am completely exhausted. So does anyone have any suggestions for me to make my face or eyes look more youthful? Is there a magic cream for me. I currently use Proactiv face wash and on occasion I use some moisturizer. I do realize that moisturized skin looks better but I am not sure what to use.
I would love some feedback in this unfamiliar girlie area?
I was having dinner with a friend last Friday night and I was complaining about the tiny little lines around my eyes. She looked at me and rolled her eyes and said they were not noticeable but, I should probably get more sleep because of the large dark circles under my eyes. GASP! She told me I looked tired. She wasn’t being mean. I think she was trying to be helpful. She then asked me what time I go to bed at night. I sheepishly replied 1:00AM.
I would like to say that I am going to go to bed earlier but I really don’t believe that I am willing to change that habit yet. I don’t like being tired in the morning but I cannot go to sleep at night until I am completely exhausted. So does anyone have any suggestions for me to make my face or eyes look more youthful? Is there a magic cream for me. I currently use Proactiv face wash and on occasion I use some moisturizer. I do realize that moisturized skin looks better but I am not sure what to use.
I would love some feedback in this unfamiliar girlie area?
October 21, 2009
Personal Training
A couple of weeks ago I told you about an opportunity I had to do some group personal training with some co-workers. I paid $75 for 4 weeks however, I am only able to attend 3 of the weeks. This leaves the cost of the training to $25 per session. At first I was excited about this new opportunity as well as a perceived inexpensive cost.
I have been very disappointed in this service. I think sometimes I try to spend too much time pleasing others and not enough time getting the value out of my service dollars. The training has been very lackluster for me. He has never challenged me or even made me break a hard sweat. Each week when I was done I knew I was capable of giving so much more. I realize that every exercise session doesn’t need to be hard core but I feel that personal training is where I need to be hard core. I don’t want someone who is mean but someone who will push me beyond what I would normally do. He never pushed me.
After I had completed my second session of training I looked at my heart rate monitor and it said that I burned 250 calories in an hour. SERIOUSLY! I swear that is what my body burns sitting at my desk. I find that unacceptable. I burn more than that walking at a leisurely pace on the Monon. I am evaluating this service because on Tuesday night I went back to trainer Mandy’s group personal training class and she kicked my ass! I know I had worked hard when I had left that class as well as received my money's worth. PS...my legs and butt still hurt.
I feel that going to Push has given me a such an education in proper body placement and form for calisthenic moves. As well as knowledge of the types of strength exercises I should be doing. I don’t feel that the work trainer guy did that for me. He would take about 7 minutes to explain a simple move and then he wouldn’t correct peoples form while they were performing the move. I feel that this is very important so you don’t hurt yourself as well as getting the most out of your workout.
I am so glad that I have learned so much from Push in the last six months. I don’t think I would have recognized the difference between a good or bad trainer when I have exercised in the past. Even though I am always money minded I never compared the cost of the two services before yesterday. The work guy’s cost is $25 per session or $18.75 if I had attend all four times. The group personal training at Push is only $12 per session. Duh…simple math. I paid for an individual session last night but next week I am going to purchase a six class pass for $72. I really think I need a twice a week hard core training with the rest of the days being lighter.
PS…I would like to note that I have decided against running the 5K. I found that it made my ankles hurt and I DID NOT ENJOY IT! I think that there are so many exercises that I enjoy why would I spend time on ones that I HATE! So…I will be walking the 5K. Perhaps in the future I will reevaluate this goal.
I have been very disappointed in this service. I think sometimes I try to spend too much time pleasing others and not enough time getting the value out of my service dollars. The training has been very lackluster for me. He has never challenged me or even made me break a hard sweat. Each week when I was done I knew I was capable of giving so much more. I realize that every exercise session doesn’t need to be hard core but I feel that personal training is where I need to be hard core. I don’t want someone who is mean but someone who will push me beyond what I would normally do. He never pushed me.
After I had completed my second session of training I looked at my heart rate monitor and it said that I burned 250 calories in an hour. SERIOUSLY! I swear that is what my body burns sitting at my desk. I find that unacceptable. I burn more than that walking at a leisurely pace on the Monon. I am evaluating this service because on Tuesday night I went back to trainer Mandy’s group personal training class and she kicked my ass! I know I had worked hard when I had left that class as well as received my money's worth. PS...my legs and butt still hurt.
I feel that going to Push has given me a such an education in proper body placement and form for calisthenic moves. As well as knowledge of the types of strength exercises I should be doing. I don’t feel that the work trainer guy did that for me. He would take about 7 minutes to explain a simple move and then he wouldn’t correct peoples form while they were performing the move. I feel that this is very important so you don’t hurt yourself as well as getting the most out of your workout.
I am so glad that I have learned so much from Push in the last six months. I don’t think I would have recognized the difference between a good or bad trainer when I have exercised in the past. Even though I am always money minded I never compared the cost of the two services before yesterday. The work guy’s cost is $25 per session or $18.75 if I had attend all four times. The group personal training at Push is only $12 per session. Duh…simple math. I paid for an individual session last night but next week I am going to purchase a six class pass for $72. I really think I need a twice a week hard core training with the rest of the days being lighter.
PS…I would like to note that I have decided against running the 5K. I found that it made my ankles hurt and I DID NOT ENJOY IT! I think that there are so many exercises that I enjoy why would I spend time on ones that I HATE! So…I will be walking the 5K. Perhaps in the future I will reevaluate this goal.
October 20, 2009
Emotional Eating
Sometimes it is easy for me to be in denial about my behavior. I like to think that I am a rational and logical person. I also like to think that my problems with eating have nothing to do with my emotions. I AM VERY WRONG!!!!
I had an extremely bad day at work yesterday. There were harsh words exchanged and I was upset all afternoon and through the evening. I exercised after work as normal but, when I got home at 7:15 I invaded the kitchen. I was overcome by a food demon and this is what I ate:
Frozen Pizza - 3 small pieces reheated
Chips - I opened the bag and began to eat, I don't know how much
Cookie's - 8 peanut butter cookies
Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich
Macaroni and Cheese - individual serving
I was finally done and my stomach hurt. Why would I do this. I could hardly move the rest of the evening after I ate all of that food. Unfortunately, I wasn't quite done with the food nonsense. Today I managed to eat McDonald's for two meals. For breakfast I has a Sausage McMuffin sans the egg and at lunch I had a fish sandwich, fries and a cookie. At least I stayed away from the burger to keep my pact with ems.
Tonight I had the 5K training at work and afterwords I decided to go to the Push It class at the gym. This class is an hour long group personal training and it is TOUGH! The instructor is a nice version of Jillian from TBL. I felt very drained and sore when I came home, but also very satisfied with myself. It was much easier for me to make better choices for dinner.
Even though I have been working out six days a week lately I don't think I have been pushing myself enough. After tonight's work out I definitely believe I am capable of more. I think I am going to dump Monday's light training in exchange for the weekly Mandy beating.
The moral of this story is that I am going to try to become more aware of my emotional eating and try to stop it before it gets out of control. Ugg...I didn't feel good after I ate all of that food.
I had an extremely bad day at work yesterday. There were harsh words exchanged and I was upset all afternoon and through the evening. I exercised after work as normal but, when I got home at 7:15 I invaded the kitchen. I was overcome by a food demon and this is what I ate:
Frozen Pizza - 3 small pieces reheated
Chips - I opened the bag and began to eat, I don't know how much
Cookie's - 8 peanut butter cookies
Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich
Macaroni and Cheese - individual serving
I was finally done and my stomach hurt. Why would I do this. I could hardly move the rest of the evening after I ate all of that food. Unfortunately, I wasn't quite done with the food nonsense. Today I managed to eat McDonald's for two meals. For breakfast I has a Sausage McMuffin sans the egg and at lunch I had a fish sandwich, fries and a cookie. At least I stayed away from the burger to keep my pact with ems.
Tonight I had the 5K training at work and afterwords I decided to go to the Push It class at the gym. This class is an hour long group personal training and it is TOUGH! The instructor is a nice version of Jillian from TBL. I felt very drained and sore when I came home, but also very satisfied with myself. It was much easier for me to make better choices for dinner.
Even though I have been working out six days a week lately I don't think I have been pushing myself enough. After tonight's work out I definitely believe I am capable of more. I think I am going to dump Monday's light training in exchange for the weekly Mandy beating.
The moral of this story is that I am going to try to become more aware of my emotional eating and try to stop it before it gets out of control. Ugg...I didn't feel good after I ate all of that food.
October 15, 2009
"The strong-minded overcome the weak-minded!"
A few weeks ago I was listening to a podcast (How Stuff Works) and at the end of the podcast one of the commentators said my now infamous quote:
"The strong-minded overcome the weak-minded!"
As soon as I heard him say the quote it immediately appealed to me. I quickly wrote it down. There has been much conversation about this new tag-line that now appears on my outbound emails. Some of it involved me become an evil queen and controlling the world. Other people were worried that I was becoming a dictator or a cult leader. We finally determined that I wouldn't be a good fit in any of those categories (primarily because I would not be able to control my minions) but I think it fits me nonetheless.
I was thinking about this today when I was emailing a friend about my goal of running a 5K. I have been having some reservations of my physically ability to complete this task. Every day that I work on my running I think about quitting. The logical part of my brain doesn't want to quit but the emotional part yells to me "YOU ARE FAT AND SHOULD NOT BE RUNNING".
I was watching "The Biggest Loser" this week and one of the contestants was having a mental block that wouldn't allow her to jump up on this one foot high platform. Every time you saw her it appeared that she wasn't really trying. The fear was holding her back. I think I feel the same way. I really don't think that I will ever be able to run 3.1 miles. It seems an impossible task so why would I spend time trying.
This is where my quote comes into play. I have to approach this with my "Strong-Mind" and not my "Weak-Mind". I know that a good portion of my battle with this new challenge is going to be mental. I also have some physical obstacles to overcome. I need to work on my cardio fitness. I still get very winded and my heart rate skyrockets after one minute of running and logically I know that I just need to work on conditioning my heart. Secondly, I am having some discomfort from the ankle that I sprained in May. I was in some pain today and I had to downplay my training today. UGG...
Does anyone have any advise for me. Are there any tricks to conditioning my heart. I should tell you that I am currently working out six days a week. I usually alternate my exercise days with hard and easy workouts. This is an example of what I have done in the last week.
Friday - Day Off
Saturday - 60 Minute Walk
Sunday - 60 Minute walk/run Intervals - 60 Minute Horseback riding
Monday - Group personal training Class - 60 Minutes
Tuesday - 35 Minute running/walking intervals
Wednesday - 60 Minute walk
Thursday - 30 Minute Personal Training
Any advise or encouragement on how to overcome my mental weakness would be appreciated as I am struggling with this goal.
"The strong-minded overcome the weak-minded!"
As soon as I heard him say the quote it immediately appealed to me. I quickly wrote it down. There has been much conversation about this new tag-line that now appears on my outbound emails. Some of it involved me become an evil queen and controlling the world. Other people were worried that I was becoming a dictator or a cult leader. We finally determined that I wouldn't be a good fit in any of those categories (primarily because I would not be able to control my minions) but I think it fits me nonetheless.
I was thinking about this today when I was emailing a friend about my goal of running a 5K. I have been having some reservations of my physically ability to complete this task. Every day that I work on my running I think about quitting. The logical part of my brain doesn't want to quit but the emotional part yells to me "YOU ARE FAT AND SHOULD NOT BE RUNNING".
I was watching "The Biggest Loser" this week and one of the contestants was having a mental block that wouldn't allow her to jump up on this one foot high platform. Every time you saw her it appeared that she wasn't really trying. The fear was holding her back. I think I feel the same way. I really don't think that I will ever be able to run 3.1 miles. It seems an impossible task so why would I spend time trying.
This is where my quote comes into play. I have to approach this with my "Strong-Mind" and not my "Weak-Mind". I know that a good portion of my battle with this new challenge is going to be mental. I also have some physical obstacles to overcome. I need to work on my cardio fitness. I still get very winded and my heart rate skyrockets after one minute of running and logically I know that I just need to work on conditioning my heart. Secondly, I am having some discomfort from the ankle that I sprained in May. I was in some pain today and I had to downplay my training today. UGG...
Does anyone have any advise for me. Are there any tricks to conditioning my heart. I should tell you that I am currently working out six days a week. I usually alternate my exercise days with hard and easy workouts. This is an example of what I have done in the last week.
Friday - Day Off
Saturday - 60 Minute Walk
Sunday - 60 Minute walk/run Intervals - 60 Minute Horseback riding
Monday - Group personal training Class - 60 Minutes
Tuesday - 35 Minute running/walking intervals
Wednesday - 60 Minute walk
Thursday - 30 Minute Personal Training
Any advise or encouragement on how to overcome my mental weakness would be appreciated as I am struggling with this goal.
October 8, 2009
Just for a Laugh
I had a silly conversation this week about fashion and we ended up talking about glasses. The conversation reminded me of the time I purchased some "fashion" glasses and I wore them everywhere thinking they looked good.
O Look...Football
O Look...Football
The hair scared you didn't it! I wonder if I ever considered using any product? This was taken at the BGSU Saturday afternoon football game. I was in junior high and all of the students got free tickets to their first home game. See how I wore the gigantic "fashion" glasses to look COOL. I really think that the glasses accent my large nose. BTW...I look exactly like my mother in this photo. I just need a cigarette to top it off.
This photo was taken in front of the junior high school. I believe this was taken in the beginning of my seventh grade year. Seriously...it was August or September and I am wearing a sweater. I am still sporting the big '80s hair and costume jewelry. Why did I purchase those jeans. They look gigantic on me. Did I even try them on? I am embarrassed to say, but I do believe I wore those fake glasses to school.
The other girl in the photo was my best friend from 5th grade until the end of high school. We lived very close together all of those years.
October 2, 2009
I have a Goal
There were three goals that I set for myself at the beginning of summer.
A. Ride a 26 mile marathon on my bike
B. Riding up Riley hill at Crown Hill without stopping
C. Have an Odometer reading of 500 miles on my bike at the end of summer
I accomplished the 26 mile marathon easily and the longest I have rode is 42 miles. I have also exceeded my odometer reading and it is currently about 650 miles (I am still a little amazed at the amount). Just so you know...summer will not be over for my bike until there is snow and ice on the ground! I have not accomplished the ride up the hill, but to be honest I haven't worked on that one very much. We stopped going to the cemetery very often because it ceased to be challenging.
I was thinking of this because I am getting ready to set myself a new goal. We are preparing to start another fitness challenge at work and it involves participating in a 5K walk. They have found a training program online that is supposed to take an inactive person from the couch to jogging a 5k in 9 weeks.
When this challenge was first discussed a couple months ago I shrugged it off as something I wouldn't participate in as I don't really like to walk. However, in the last month I have realized given the right circumstances I do like to walk and I find it a relaxing activity. I attribute this to three things:
A. I am in better shape now that I have been in forever due to the biking passion
B. Great company while exploring the area parks
C. Any outside activity interests me
I have decided that in addition to participating in the 5K, I want to jog it. Seriously, I want to try and jog 3.4 miles. I KNOW....Crazy Right. I wouldn't have said that 3 months ago. I would have laughed and said you are out of your mind. But, something has changed inside of my brain and I think I may have a chance of accomplishing this goal. The early summer goals were so easy for me to accomplish and they seemed daunting when I set them. I think that half of the battle is attitude and the second half is putting in the training work.
To be honest I do like working out. Some would say that I am getting a bit of a big head about fitness, but that quickly goes away when I hang out with an athletic person. However, it is good for me to hang out with the athletic people because they challenge me.
The training will begin on October 12, 2009. The training is comprised of a three day a week program that begins with baby steps of jogging. I have two friends who are interesting in participating in this with me. Is anyone else interested in participating or training with me?
I might need some encouragement in this new goal so the next time you see me ask me if I have been doing my training.
PS...this is how my brain works...if I say I am going to do something and it is widely known...it is hard for me to back out of it.
A. Ride a 26 mile marathon on my bike
B. Riding up Riley hill at Crown Hill without stopping
C. Have an Odometer reading of 500 miles on my bike at the end of summer
I accomplished the 26 mile marathon easily and the longest I have rode is 42 miles. I have also exceeded my odometer reading and it is currently about 650 miles (I am still a little amazed at the amount). Just so you know...summer will not be over for my bike until there is snow and ice on the ground! I have not accomplished the ride up the hill, but to be honest I haven't worked on that one very much. We stopped going to the cemetery very often because it ceased to be challenging.
I was thinking of this because I am getting ready to set myself a new goal. We are preparing to start another fitness challenge at work and it involves participating in a 5K walk. They have found a training program online that is supposed to take an inactive person from the couch to jogging a 5k in 9 weeks.
When this challenge was first discussed a couple months ago I shrugged it off as something I wouldn't participate in as I don't really like to walk. However, in the last month I have realized given the right circumstances I do like to walk and I find it a relaxing activity. I attribute this to three things:
A. I am in better shape now that I have been in forever due to the biking passion
B. Great company while exploring the area parks
C. Any outside activity interests me
I have decided that in addition to participating in the 5K, I want to jog it. Seriously, I want to try and jog 3.4 miles. I KNOW....Crazy Right. I wouldn't have said that 3 months ago. I would have laughed and said you are out of your mind. But, something has changed inside of my brain and I think I may have a chance of accomplishing this goal. The early summer goals were so easy for me to accomplish and they seemed daunting when I set them. I think that half of the battle is attitude and the second half is putting in the training work.
To be honest I do like working out. Some would say that I am getting a bit of a big head about fitness, but that quickly goes away when I hang out with an athletic person. However, it is good for me to hang out with the athletic people because they challenge me.
The training will begin on October 12, 2009. The training is comprised of a three day a week program that begins with baby steps of jogging. I have two friends who are interesting in participating in this with me. Is anyone else interested in participating or training with me?
I might need some encouragement in this new goal so the next time you see me ask me if I have been doing my training.
PS...this is how my brain works...if I say I am going to do something and it is widely known...it is hard for me to back out of it.
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